El Futuro, El Pasado.

I find that looking back on my life trying figure out what it is that i have learned over the course of my life is strange. It is always hard to believe that one has come so far. Even if I only go back ten years. Amazing. I havent really had an major expectations or asperations for myself so i cannot say that i am disappointed at where i am at. I dont know what is in store but for once i am really excited about it. It changes everyday!

quite obviously, right now i am avoiding the inevitable...studying for my physics test. I have already had one test this morning and in t-minus 3hrs and counting i have another test in Physics. So i really suppose that i should stop typing and go study. And i am sad because i really want to go to gingerman tonight but my friends are mostly busy. So it appears i might have to celebrate alone. :(

What is it about being drunk and having a "fabulous" time that makes people..ie myself make the worst decisions? That is all.

Movies!

Tonight i saw the most awesome, amazing movie. It gave me goosebumps! So lovely and strangely uplifting. Anyways it was called "Once" and if you have not had the pleasure of seeing it DO!

who wants to be a simpson? Oooh oohh i do

I will have what i want

I want a love that is never boring and predictable but is simple. I want love that is amazing and not just easy, the kind of love you never forget no matter how hard you try. I want something that is unbelievably right. I want love that is easy and difficult at the same time. I want time, god how i want time for us, and for me, and for him. I want someone who can easily tell me he needs time without hurting me. I want to love what i do everyday of my life. I want to enjoy every second, every moment i have here. I want to never be angry. I want to see the world. i want time at home, where it is at the time. I want to hurt until I cant take it anymore and then realize my happiness. I want to walk in the rain. I want to feel the sunshine on my face. I want music. I want to inspire people. I want someone to inspire me. I want to spend the rest of my life with someone who loves me so much it hurts and isnt afraid to show me. I want to love someone so much it hurts and not be afraid to show it. I want long hikes. I want camping under the stars. I want endless sunsets. I want to treat someone so incrediably that they cant stand it. I want time with my friends. I want picnics. I want weekends at the beach. I want solitary car rides. I want someone to tell stories to, someone who listens. I want to listen. I want beautiful flowers. I want to fly. I want sleep. I want dreams. I want a neverending love that REALLY never ends. I want second chances. I want to deserve second chances. I want to sip wine. I want to write. I want to always remember. I want to dream. I want to live my dreams. I want a not so perfect love, that wants my not so perfect love.

What Your Soul Really Looks Like

You are a warm hearted and open minded person. It's easy for you to forgive and forget. You are a grounded person, but you also leave room for imagination and dreams. You feet may be on the ground, but you're head is in the clouds. You believe that people see you for how you are, not how you look. But deep down, you know that's not exactly true. Your near future is still unknown, and a little scary. You'll get through wild times - and you'll textually enjoy it. For you, love is all about caring and comfort. You couldn't fall in love with someone you didn't trust.

Inside the Room of Your Soul

finally

i finally slept last night for once in a few days. I had the most vivid dreams and i woke up this morning sad. I dont want to be sad. I have to go for a run.

yesterday was insane...school was the biggest hassel. I was enrolled in the wrong class, i had to talk to the dean, then the assistant dean, then the dean again. But i got the issue resolved. And while most of this was going on and pretty much most of the day, i talked to my lovely friend Kimmie. Which helped me quite tremendously in my current circumstances.

I am sooo tired. Tired of dealing with emotional things in my life. And just plain tired. I just want to feel numb right now. Just for a little while.

If love really was like it is in the movies...then i wouldn't be in the place that i am now. And the truth is...I know exactly where it is that i would be.

You are The Sun

Happiness, Content, Joy.

The meanings for the Sun are fairly simple and consistent.

Young, healthy, new, fresh. The brain is working, things that were muddled come clear, everything falls into place, and everything seems to go your way.

The Sun is ruled by the Sun, of course. This is the light that comes after the long dark night, Apollo to the Moon's Diana. A positive card, it promises you your day in the sun. Glory, gain, triumph, pleasure, truth, success. As the moon symbolized inspiration from the unconscious, from dreams, this card symbolizes discoveries made fully consciousness and wide awake. You have an understanding and enjoyment of science and math, beautifully constructed music, carefully reasoned philosophy. It is a card of intellect, clarity of mind, and feelings of youthful energy.

What Tarot Card are You?
Take the Test to Find Out.

Stranger than Fiction...

a really great movie i saw last night. I really enjoyed the screenplay alot. And of course it left me feeling really great when i leaving the theater. Upliftting.

argh...a three mile run and i am exhausted but so is my dog. Life is good.

i am in a good place right now. I bit confused...caught in a whirlwind...floating...falling...but i've lost the fear of the end.
I'm not looking for miracles, i'm just happy with now. A wonderful place to be, a vast and endless ocean with no storms in sight.

ACL, ACL, woohoo! yAY! just a few more days! yes!

The small things...

There are a million little things in this big ol world that make me happy...The last few moments spent waiting to get on the plane to go on a long trip. Music. A great poem discovered, writing one myself(well maybe not great but good to say the least). Orange juice. Bananas. Strawberries. Football! Finishing the last page of a book you've loved...bittersweet. Developing the photos from a trip. A great cup of coffee. A really fun day a work. A long hike. The view from the top of a mountain. Saving all the money you needed to go on your big trip. Bagels with cream cheese. Lying in the sun thinking of all the wonderful things and people you have in your life. Knowing you are not alone, even when you are. Incense. A song that steals your breath and touches your soul. A kiss that does the same. Plants. trees. daisies. Dogs. cats. song birds. Animals. Truly good hearted people. Friends. LOVE. Falling in love. Knowing you have loved. Friends who love you. Knowing there is a reason for everything. The morning sky and the smell of dew. The evening sky and the smell of the ocean. The way my feet feel in the sand. The wind on my face. A really great joke. A terrific glass of wine. A strong, cold beer. A day spent with all your friends. A day spent with your best friend. A day spent with no one but yourself. Hammocks. Waves. Exercise. Picnics. Dancing. The Sun. A rainy day watching movies with someone you love. Snuggling. A great movie. Chocolate. Something that really makes you think.
Watching the sunrise. A long drive. Sunsets over the water. Seeing new places. Really feeling. Crying. Smiling. Laughing. Popcorn. A bottle of Coke. A long walk to clear my head. Margaritas. Making someone laugh. Just being here.

I mean seriously. Are there any real ones out there? Nevermind.

911 Cover Up

Loose Change 2nd Edition - Korey Rowe / Dylan Avery / Jason Bermas

America's birthday...

Well, I felt compelled to sit down and let you all know what disaster awaited me and my roomate on the 4th.
The day started out perfectly normal. I worked in the morning and had plans to head to New Braunfels for the afternoon.
After work I headed home to meet my roomate and we loaded up in my car. Off we went, first stopping for gas and a few groceries to tide us over for the evening. Then on down the road. ( Let me also say that I was either getting sick or having the worst allergy attack of my life. So my roomie was driving and I was feeling overwhelmingly exhausted) About the time that we reached exit 201, yes exit 201 which I am now very familiar with, we heard some noise. Of course we both assumed that it was simply a blowout and figured we would just need to change the tire, no problem right? After we were stopped we of course realized the tires were fine, so what could it be? "Pop the hood" I say. In about 30 seconds I realize we have blown a belt...damn. Stranded we are, yes.
Phone calls are then made and soon my dad is on his way to save the day. Mind you, by the time that my dad arrives the roomie and I have been there for almost 2 hours.
We attempt to change the belt but no sooner than we had begun it starts to pour. And I mean pour... thunder, lightning, not the perfect car repair weather. The daylight is also fading.
Now the last thing that i really want to do is leave my car parked where it is currently. So knowing, full well, that my dad cannot fix it in this rain I have to figure out what to do. I finally realize that I have roadside assistance on my car. So I begin the process of trying to get a tow. Finally, a tow trick is on its way. So I tell my dad he can head home.
Well, My roomie and I hang out waiting for this truck. And about 2 hours later it arrives. Exhausted we pile into the truck. Now remember that it was around 4:30pm when we pulled our car onto exit 201. And at exactly 11:15pm we arrived at my dad's house. Over six hours later.
And as I crawled into bed I realized "Shoot, i missed the fireworks." :)