Tell me do you believe
In the girl that is me
With her feet to your feet
Well that’s all that I need

Cause time will go
And we may be
Far apart I know
But as far as I can see
This is so good
There’s no need for change
It’s alright with me
It’s as simple as it should be
Simple as it should be -----Tristan Prettyman

"Wisdom ceases to be wisdom when it becomes too proud to weep, too grave to laugh, and too selfish to seek other than itself."
Kahlil Gibran


"Love and doubt have never been on speaking terms."
Kahlil Gibran

Saving the Date.

the date is set...no later than June 15th...that now gives me three months...got to get it together. 2 weeks in Costa Rica and 2 weeks somewhere else.

cause i really liked this one.

human life occurs only once, and the reason we cannot determine which of our decisions are good and which are bad is that in a given situation we can make only one decision; we are not granted a second, third, or fourth life in which to compare various decisions. -milan kundera

the god damn plane has crashed into the mountain!

I have recently been rereading all the posts i have made in the past. It seems, to me at least, that when i first started putting my thoughts down here...my writing was more honest...and sometimes even a tad bit humorous (at least to myself, hey if you can make one person laugh). Maybe, i haven't been taking myself seriously for a long time...whatever the reason, i am disconcerted. And have the desire, need, to change things.
Not even just to change things in this blog but to change things i am doing in my life. I am certain that i have not entirely been taking myself seriously in many aspects for quite some time now. I have been planning a trip for about 8 months now and find that i am no closer to leaving than i was when i started. The desire is there, the yearning, the needing, but something inside this silly little head of mine has been slowing me down. This needs to change. No more postponing..."This will not stand, man."

So i am setting a date. Enough is enough. "The god damn plane has crashed into the mountain!"

not all who wander are lost

i am wandering through this life just hoping for the things that make me happy...it's not to hard to know what these things are when you find them...suppose it is the search that makes it difficult...so instead of searching i suppose i will keep wandering.

A dust covered window obstructs the view...
and somewhere on the opposite side...a endless sky of blue.
A shattered heart conceals the truth...
a miraculous passion within the depths of you.
A fearful soul disguises the way...
to an endless road of happiness, one can only really know today.
A bitter past shrouds a hopeful future
with the dismal convictions of what cannot be.

Were one to wake each morning with thoughts of only the day ahead.
And lay down to rest with simply the intention of tomorrow.
To forget the mysterious future with thoughts of only here and now.

To never fear tomorrow is to know we can only be alive in this moment.
Silence the shattered heart, for it is your past.
Quiet the fearful soul, for it speaks not for today.
Listen only to the blissful heart for it speaks of what we know to be.
A love we have found within ourselves, a future that is impossible to see.
This very moment in time is all that can matter if a heart is truly allowed to be free.


Molly 2009

figured it out

So for once in my life i think i have really finally figured a few things out. Good things

Goals for the Next year...

Read my friends and realized i should have my own.

1. Go to Vegas, Denver, and Costa rica(for a month) in March.
2. Get a job with southwest airlines.
3. Work on going back to school.
4. Always be myself...no matter what.
5. Love as much as I can...
6. Be passionate about life.

I should just buy this ticket

Holy crap i found a multicity ticket to vegas, denver, costa rica, and back to austin for about $550. i need to just buy this ticket and that will make me bust my ass and save the money that i need to head to costa rica for a month and a week in the other cities. Holy shit!!! I am excited. If the price is the same at the end of the week i am just going to buy it. Hooray me!!!

so costa rica...when shall i see you again.

I have not been able to get into a cedra study or save an obscene amount of money...so costa rica seems to get pushed back over and over again. When will i see it again. It appears it will be sometime this summer...and i will be going even if only for two weeks. I am going to push for april or may. Wish me luck.

I have made a decision

When i get into this study that i have signed up for on next tuesday. And i am sure that i am officially a subject and not a backup. I will be purchasing my ticket to costa rica for late January. That way i will have to get my ass on saving for the trip and have no way of postponing it back month after month. This i believe is a good plan.

could you be loved?

So the results are in...and the word precancerous has reared its ugly little head. While i am reassured that it is mearly PRE...i cannot shake the C-word following it up so closely. i have to say that i am more than a little bit freaked out but i also feel that i am coping rather well. Although part of that coping comes from avoiding thinking about it.

Officially awful days

Doctor's. Ugh. yuck. All i will say is that i do not like the girl doctor.

I wish, I wish, I wish...

For sooo many things right now. For the money to go to Costa Rica, to not have to deal with any problems that start with the C word, Even wishes as simple as getting to spend this evening with a great guy. Maybe even for the desire to write some more poetry, it has been a long time since i've written anything at all.

Why of why wont they let me fly?

So as i and the rest of the country are already aware...the economy is not so good. With our severe dependence on foreign oil we are slipping in so many industries. I am sure that in a year or so our economy will begin to turn around and face the right direction again...well maybe not "SURE" but definatly optomistic about it doing so. The only way in which it is affecting me in my current situation is that things are more expensive and i havent been able to get a job with SWA let alone an interview. But im holding out, knowing that i a year or so they will lift the hiring freeze and i will be on my way "free to move about the county"
As for everything else in my world...it is great. I have a neato new apt that will be costing me less money. I am taking care of a few health issues. And i am dating someone new :)

acl bound

So usually i am super excited about the arrival of ACL and for some reason i am sort of "cool" about this year. I should or would have already been there at this time every year previously. but there really isnt anyone i want to see until about three. Oh and i brilliantly forgot my ticket so i have to return home to retrieve it soon. But first...lunch, coffee, and a few words. I am sure that when i arrive at Zilker the feeling will change and i will be super excited but until then i will continue to be hungover from too much fun last night.
Also...i feel that i overanalyze every aspect of my life. I am continually too hard on myself. I have to say that i am ridiculously happy right now but that i worry too much. I am working on putting those thoughts aside every time they appear but I have been a worrier for so long that i find it a bit difficult of a habit to break. But I quit smoking, which was a hard habit to break, so i am sure that i can accomplish this one as well. Hooray Life!!! Life is pretty freaking awesome.

Ideas that work

So far it seems there is only one puzzle piece missing in my life. Come on puzzle piece! How can the fantastic life of fiery red be the most fantastic successfull life ever if you are not in the puzzle? I know that it will happen. I has already begun to unfold so i just need to wait for the rest of it to fall into place. All the pieces are their they just need to be connected.

How Much

How much coffee can i drink in one sitting. Answer...too much and still counting.
I had a really long day at work and tomorrow is the dreaded double. I am in avoidance of packing the apartment for the big move in 10 days. I am nervous and ridiculously excited about the whole thing.
Cha Cha changes. Moving, The big ACL weekend. Starting a new job. Going back to school. Life, love. Hmmm.
as always leaving things as vague as possible.

Also

I found a great site that allows me to go through all the airlines web pages and check to see who is hiring. :)