Friday, February 12, 2010
I promise
myself that i am going to sit down on monday...my day off and finish my resume. Gosh Darnit!!!
Thursday, January 28, 2010
Trudging in silence down a long reticent road
a man carries burdens, expectedly his alone.
Treasuring a simple solace, to live solely for today
Each time a caring soul crossed his path he purely pushed them by the way.
A simple desire for knowledge, a mind built for brilliant thoughts
Leaving simple feelings to simply be forgot.
Is it lonely on your road? A passerby might question?
To walk so simply without a sole possession?
To care naught or have love in your heart?
To remember no one each day and you rise and depart?
With all of the knowledge the traveler is known to shoulder
Is there not one question that mesmerizes him as he continually grows older?
Yes, Possessions are useless they can be lost and refound, broken or forgotten and simply tossed to the ground.
But why is it Love that eludes him? its rhyme, it has none. One moment he has it and the next it is gone.
Alone he'll continue to travel, gathering all the knowledge one can aquire
And still loves mystery will evade him but the answer he'll still desire.
Ultimately emotions seem useless, unlike the Reason and Knowledge he easily attains.
After all, love has no reason, it simply appears deranged.
a man carries burdens, expectedly his alone.
Treasuring a simple solace, to live solely for today
Each time a caring soul crossed his path he purely pushed them by the way.
A simple desire for knowledge, a mind built for brilliant thoughts
Leaving simple feelings to simply be forgot.
Is it lonely on your road? A passerby might question?
To walk so simply without a sole possession?
To care naught or have love in your heart?
To remember no one each day and you rise and depart?
With all of the knowledge the traveler is known to shoulder
Is there not one question that mesmerizes him as he continually grows older?
Yes, Possessions are useless they can be lost and refound, broken or forgotten and simply tossed to the ground.
But why is it Love that eludes him? its rhyme, it has none. One moment he has it and the next it is gone.
Alone he'll continue to travel, gathering all the knowledge one can aquire
And still loves mystery will evade him but the answer he'll still desire.
Ultimately emotions seem useless, unlike the Reason and Knowledge he easily attains.
After all, love has no reason, it simply appears deranged.
Friday, January 22, 2010
Friday night...
i have begun writing again...not blogs but back to poetry...some good, some not so really that even close to good. All this depending on the audience i suppose. However, it is friday night I have the evening to myself and quite honestly i haven't wanted it any other way...cat in one arm(literally, my cat is always up in somebody's business), dog in the other. I have worked on reading stuff about writing my resume, a bit, and i have more info on the way tomorrow, my friend apparently has something i should read. I have also, on this lovely friday night, realized i am a complete and utter sucker for many many many countless unforgettable reasons, i've decided not to go into these reasons for the time being. Instead i will say that I am looking forward to many things, such as...my nephews birthday next wed when i will be going to dallas to hang out for the day!!! hoorah! And next month heading to the valley to visit my good friend and her brand new baby!!! yay! exciting fun stuff. Outside of these wonderful days, i am saving as much as i can to take a trip this summer!!! Working as hard as i have been mentally able on my resume. Should it take this long??? I'm starting to wonder. however, im now sure that it will be amazing when i am finished. ;-0 ;-)
Friday, January 15, 2010
Buckets of rain, buckets of tea, buckets of liquid all over me
So it seems i end my day exactly as i began it,dripping sopping, soaking, wet.
I returned to work for my second shift this evening and had been there for no more than 45 min into my 3hour shift before a dark cloud emerged upon the scene. I am standing in the food window and my manager plows through the area and suceeds in catching the tea bucket with his belt and it plummets to the floor...a tidal wave of tea sweeps across the line and comes to rest on the shore otherwise known and the back of my pants and insides of my shoes. I attempted, with no avail, of course, to "clean up" but instead spent the rest of the evening sloshing around the restaurant in my dripping pant legs and water laden shoes.
I am now safe and dry in the comfort of my home and decidedly will stay here and listen to the rain (stay) outside.
I returned to work for my second shift this evening and had been there for no more than 45 min into my 3hour shift before a dark cloud emerged upon the scene. I am standing in the food window and my manager plows through the area and suceeds in catching the tea bucket with his belt and it plummets to the floor...a tidal wave of tea sweeps across the line and comes to rest on the shore otherwise known and the back of my pants and insides of my shoes. I attempted, with no avail, of course, to "clean up" but instead spent the rest of the evening sloshing around the restaurant in my dripping pant legs and water laden shoes.
I am now safe and dry in the comfort of my home and decidedly will stay here and listen to the rain (stay) outside.
Running in the Rain, Just running in the Rain
When i awoke this morning i thought to myself "gee i think i should go for a run, after all i work a double and won't have a chance later" I looked down and my sweet little pup and asked him what he thought. He just cocked his little head as if to say "really? Really? we can go running in the rain? YES!!!" Being the tremendously intelligent girl that i am i simply thought "it's only drizzling, we can do this"
Soooo when i was rounding the corner back to my house after my 2ish mile run in the pouring(yes POURING) down rain, i wondered to myself if i should have thought this venture through a bit more. I did of course go out with My new i-pod, my new nike i-pod sensor(to track my speed, miles, time, of course) oh and in shorts. Yeah did i mention i just threw on some running SHORTS! I did think through the decision just enough to grab a jacket(not a rain jacket though, just a little something to keep me warm, you know).
To be honest, it wasn't really all that bad till i was about a mile or so from the house, still drizzling(picking up a little but still a drizzle) but somehow it seemed that the temperature had dropped considerably since i left the house or MAYBE just MAYBE it was only colder because now instead of warm and dry i was covered in the mear drizzle, that after time is not just mear drizzle on you and your clothes ...i suppose it MIGHT be a bit colder outside if you are soaking wet.
I have to mention that, The ipod etc were just fine in my pocket and inside the bottom of my shoe. So no harm there. Just a silly, cold, wet, girl, who so desperately needed to go out in the rain for a run.
Soooo when i was rounding the corner back to my house after my 2ish mile run in the pouring(yes POURING) down rain, i wondered to myself if i should have thought this venture through a bit more. I did of course go out with My new i-pod, my new nike i-pod sensor(to track my speed, miles, time, of course) oh and in shorts. Yeah did i mention i just threw on some running SHORTS! I did think through the decision just enough to grab a jacket(not a rain jacket though, just a little something to keep me warm, you know).
To be honest, it wasn't really all that bad till i was about a mile or so from the house, still drizzling(picking up a little but still a drizzle) but somehow it seemed that the temperature had dropped considerably since i left the house or MAYBE just MAYBE it was only colder because now instead of warm and dry i was covered in the mear drizzle, that after time is not just mear drizzle on you and your clothes ...i suppose it MIGHT be a bit colder outside if you are soaking wet.
I have to mention that, The ipod etc were just fine in my pocket and inside the bottom of my shoe. So no harm there. Just a silly, cold, wet, girl, who so desperately needed to go out in the rain for a run.
Wednesday, January 06, 2010
Sunday, January 03, 2010
Hello World.
Locked up for another weekend as a lab rat, ready to be jabbed with needles and fed enough food for a small army. My thoughts wander to next weekend where mexico, margaritas, textiles, nifty trinkets, and a handsome man await me.
I am slowly approaching 30, yes 30... I round the corner to 30 in 3 days. I'm not sure if I am at ease or biting my nails about this birthday. It should, after all, not be any different than any before it. In fact, it should be more astonishing. We have all just entered a new decade and I am simultaneously entering a new decade of my life. And I am actually overcome with a feeling that my third decade will be filled with more amazing experiences and HOPEFULLY a reduced amount of meltdowns(i have been the queen of external and internal meltdowns throughout the previous decade). I now leave decade #2 behind and pass into decade #3 with hopes of being less neurotic and with dreams of jubilation, love, and laughter.
I am slowly approaching 30, yes 30... I round the corner to 30 in 3 days. I'm not sure if I am at ease or biting my nails about this birthday. It should, after all, not be any different than any before it. In fact, it should be more astonishing. We have all just entered a new decade and I am simultaneously entering a new decade of my life. And I am actually overcome with a feeling that my third decade will be filled with more amazing experiences and HOPEFULLY a reduced amount of meltdowns(i have been the queen of external and internal meltdowns throughout the previous decade). I now leave decade #2 behind and pass into decade #3 with hopes of being less neurotic and with dreams of jubilation, love, and laughter.
Friday, January 01, 2010
Monday, December 28, 2009
I posted this a few months ago...but i really like it soooo...
"Twenty years from now....
... you will be more disappointed by the things you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines, sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.” - Mark Twain
... you will be more disappointed by the things you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines, sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.” - Mark Twain
Friday, December 25, 2009
Sunday, December 20, 2009
New Year! New Resolutions!
Last year I made a few promises to myself...or what one may call resolutions...
Looking at them i have realized that i accomplished most but not all of them.
* I did "work" on going back to school but never actually did it.
* With the help of my amazingly stupendous super awesome boyfriend, i DID go to Las Vegas!
* I did not go to Costa Rica but instead went to Guatemala which was absolutely amazing!
* I have not gotten a Job with SAID airline but i am Still working on it.
* I HAVE definitely loved all that i can and been passionate about life.
SOOOOO...
New Year...New dreams.
2010.
1. South Africa! Travel as much as possible.
2. Write more...i used to write poetry all the time, i used to love it, even if it wasn't great I loved writing.
3. Don't forget the camera...i have a great camera and love to take photos.
4. Spend more time outdoors, I love the outdoors.
5. Be less stressed about the small stuff.
6. Make a million dollars!!! (hey, we need to have our dreams)
7. Do more for the ones i love, and be better about showing and telling them i love them.
8. Volunteer. I really feel like i have the time to help, so i should help others.
9. Love as much as i can and be passionate everyday.
10. Finish my resume. And be happy with it.
11. Find a career. Something out there that i will love and get paid to do.
I think i need to cut it here because too much can be overwhelming.
And i feel that sometimes i expect too much of myself and end up disappointed.
Actually I'll add one more.
12. Have No expectations.
So i suppose this and #9 should be the only thing on my list.
;-)
Looking at them i have realized that i accomplished most but not all of them.
* I did "work" on going back to school but never actually did it.
* With the help of my amazingly stupendous super awesome boyfriend, i DID go to Las Vegas!
* I did not go to Costa Rica but instead went to Guatemala which was absolutely amazing!
* I have not gotten a Job with SAID airline but i am Still working on it.
* I HAVE definitely loved all that i can and been passionate about life.
SOOOOO...
New Year...New dreams.
2010.
1. South Africa! Travel as much as possible.
2. Write more...i used to write poetry all the time, i used to love it, even if it wasn't great I loved writing.
3. Don't forget the camera...i have a great camera and love to take photos.
4. Spend more time outdoors, I love the outdoors.
5. Be less stressed about the small stuff.
6. Make a million dollars!!! (hey, we need to have our dreams)
7. Do more for the ones i love, and be better about showing and telling them i love them.
8. Volunteer. I really feel like i have the time to help, so i should help others.
9. Love as much as i can and be passionate everyday.
10. Finish my resume. And be happy with it.
11. Find a career. Something out there that i will love and get paid to do.
I think i need to cut it here because too much can be overwhelming.
And i feel that sometimes i expect too much of myself and end up disappointed.
Actually I'll add one more.
12. Have No expectations.
So i suppose this and #9 should be the only thing on my list.
;-)
Monday, November 30, 2009
Thursday, November 12, 2009
Tuesday, November 10, 2009
Friday, October 30, 2009
Thursday, October 29, 2009
Monday, October 26, 2009
This one is for the girl(personal ramblings)
These days i think a lot. More and more, i am afraid. Of what lies ahead, of what i have left behind. Yet I have no regrets. The world can only get better, with all the hope i have in my heart.
The sun has to shine! But sometimes we walk through life blind. Tell me, is the view from the top of the mountain as gorgeous when you don't have anyone with whom to share it? Is a song as beautiful if you have no other to which you can compare it? Could happiness exist without sorrow? Could love be alive without hate. The sun cannot rise if it never sets. At every beginning there is an end.
The sun has to shine! But sometimes we walk through life blind. Tell me, is the view from the top of the mountain as gorgeous when you don't have anyone with whom to share it? Is a song as beautiful if you have no other to which you can compare it? Could happiness exist without sorrow? Could love be alive without hate. The sun cannot rise if it never sets. At every beginning there is an end.
Monday, October 12, 2009
Tuesday, September 29, 2009
Tuesday, September 15, 2009
Maybe i need to meditate.
my mind is constantly full of nonsense thoughts that need to exit out the side door.
Thursday, August 13, 2009
Monday, August 10, 2009
Sunday, August 09, 2009
it's late...3 more days!!!!
my bob dylan cd will not burn onto my laptop...grrrrr. My boyfriend is absurdly sunburned ;-( poor guy...sunburns really suck. I have no idea why, at 1am, i am not even remotely tired. It is about time to MAKE myself go to bed >:-( grrrr.
But on the sunny side of life(sorry boyfriend) 3 more days till the big trip yippeee!!!!
The other day my sister asked me why i am always saving for vacations...i didnt know what to say except "what else is there to save for?"
But on the sunny side of life(sorry boyfriend) 3 more days till the big trip yippeee!!!!
The other day my sister asked me why i am always saving for vacations...i didnt know what to say except "what else is there to save for?"
Tuesday, August 04, 2009
Monday, July 27, 2009
Things i need to practice harder at...
Practice Gratitude when you feel good and when you feel unfulfilled
Clear the Path, let go of relationships, things and habits that aren't serving growth
Observe without attachment or taking things personally
Let go of the "story" and the expected 'outcome' of everything (being selective here doesn't work)
Tell the truth
Notice the dance between your faith and your action
Recognize the information within and around you
Align with Integrity
Channel Creativity
Love Completely from whatever distance is appropriate
Clear the Path, let go of relationships, things and habits that aren't serving growth
Observe without attachment or taking things personally
Let go of the "story" and the expected 'outcome' of everything (being selective here doesn't work)
Tell the truth
Notice the dance between your faith and your action
Recognize the information within and around you
Align with Integrity
Channel Creativity
Love Completely from whatever distance is appropriate
Saturday, July 25, 2009
I AM a woman.
Without super powers or surgery i have no way of changing this... Often i try...i do try...i really try...but in the end i AM, well, I am just, Deep down, just me...me. My feelings get hurt, i over analyze(and try to under analyze to make up for it). I THINK about everything way too much...I TALK...all the time...I listen because i care ...I try to work out everything OUTLOUD!
I cry, I pout, I...am, well, a woman...something I take a great deal of pride in, actually...simply because...I AM A WOMAN...I feel, I feel too much, I love, love too much, i see, I see too much...I talk, I talk way too much. This is...is...ME. I am the person i am, And simply because i choose to be..........me. I could try even harder to be less of who i am but the truth is....why not Talk too much, feel too much, love too much, think too much, analyze too much....why not?...just live as much as you can, Live as much as you are allowed? I see no reason to be less of the person i have grown to be.
I cry, I pout, I...am, well, a woman...something I take a great deal of pride in, actually...simply because...I AM A WOMAN...I feel, I feel too much, I love, love too much, i see, I see too much...I talk, I talk way too much. This is...is...ME. I am the person i am, And simply because i choose to be..........me. I could try even harder to be less of who i am but the truth is....why not Talk too much, feel too much, love too much, think too much, analyze too much....why not?...just live as much as you can, Live as much as you are allowed? I see no reason to be less of the person i have grown to be.
Saturday, July 18, 2009
Away We Go
tonight...8pm.
I'll tell you about it later.
Loved it, loved it, loved it (enough to see it again)did i mention that i loved it...dave eggers and Vendela Vida you rock.
I'll tell you about it later.
Loved it, loved it, loved it (enough to see it again)did i mention that i loved it...dave eggers and Vendela Vida you rock.
Is this my Answer?
Horoscope Capricorn-
Sure, you have a lot of decisions to make right now -- but don't think that you have to spend the same amount of time making each one! Prioritize and act more quickly than you usually do. Don't waste too much time mulling things over. Your gut is going to help you make the right choices, so use it. Too much research and deliberation will paralyze you. Act without really knowing what outcome will be, and things will be most favorable for you.
Sure, you have a lot of decisions to make right now -- but don't think that you have to spend the same amount of time making each one! Prioritize and act more quickly than you usually do. Don't waste too much time mulling things over. Your gut is going to help you make the right choices, so use it. Too much research and deliberation will paralyze you. Act without really knowing what outcome will be, and things will be most favorable for you.
Friday, July 17, 2009
something has got to give
I feel as if life as i know it right now needs some remodeling.
And i don't mean the go out and by a new outfit or a cool lamp kind of remodeling.
I am chewing on the idea of going back to school and getting another degree.
But mainly what i want is some change in my everyday life...i am verging on being dog tired. I am not unhappy, on the contrary, i am very happy with most of my world currently. But, I need to acquire a new position in life. I require some bearing, focus, intent, I am simply adrift at the moment and i am growing weary. I don't know if what I NEED is a new job but i am feeling that the scale is tipping in that direction. So it seems i need to sit down or stand up and figure out exactly what all of this means and DO something about it!
And i don't mean the go out and by a new outfit or a cool lamp kind of remodeling.
I am chewing on the idea of going back to school and getting another degree.
But mainly what i want is some change in my everyday life...i am verging on being dog tired. I am not unhappy, on the contrary, i am very happy with most of my world currently. But, I need to acquire a new position in life. I require some bearing, focus, intent, I am simply adrift at the moment and i am growing weary. I don't know if what I NEED is a new job but i am feeling that the scale is tipping in that direction. So it seems i need to sit down or stand up and figure out exactly what all of this means and DO something about it!
Sunday, July 12, 2009
Saturday, July 11, 2009
My House This lovely saturday...
Thursday, July 09, 2009
Wednesday, July 01, 2009
Monday, June 29, 2009
Tuesday, June 23, 2009
A day with with the Dad
Had a blast with my dad last night. I forget how much i really like him. Yes, of course i love him but i really like him too. He is abrasive and loud, he can't tell a story without being extremely passionate. But for some reason it makes me laugh...probably because i see it in myself as well. He has, for the last 14 years or so, been someone with whom i can really just be myself, laugh, talk about the things that bother me, talk about the things that are making me happy, he always knows what to say to make me feel better about any situation, and just generally someone with whom i can have a great time.
Thursday, June 18, 2009
Monday, June 15, 2009
I love days off. You wake up(whenever you desire), brush your teeth(hopefully, if you still have all of them), and spend you day doing whatever it is your heart fancies(and your pocketbook can handle). You can see whomever you yearn to see. Read anything you have an inclination to read, relax, put your feet up, lay in a hammock(it may be a bit on the warm side here in Texas...100degrees, yowza), Go for a run, picnic in the park or take the dogs out to romp. Catch a movie or take a drive out to the lake...you get the point.
It however is always much better when you have more than one or two days to spend in whatever way seems fitting.
It however is always much better when you have more than one or two days to spend in whatever way seems fitting.
Monday, June 08, 2009
Sunday, June 07, 2009
"I began dividing life in absolutes... Things and people were either perfectly bad, or perfectly good, and when life didn't obey this black-and-white rule, when things or people were complex or contradictory, I pretended otherwise. I turned every defeat into a disaster, every success into an epic triumph, and separated all people into heroes or villains. Unable to bear ambiguity, I built a barricade of delusions against it. "
— J.R. Moehringer (The Tender Bar: A Memoir)
— J.R. Moehringer (The Tender Bar: A Memoir)
Friday, June 05, 2009
Thursday, May 28, 2009
""I hate when people ask what a book is about. People who read for plot, people who suck out the story like the cream filling in an Oreo, should stick to comic strips and soap operas. . . . Every book worth a damn is about emotions and love and death and pain. It's about words. It's about a man dealing with life. Okay?" "
— J. R. Moehringer
— J. R. Moehringer
Tuesday, May 26, 2009
Thursday, May 21, 2009
Today...I don't believe in saving for retirement
...i believe in living simply for today.
I believe in moments, i believe in minutes, i believe in time. It passes, it never ceases, it lives on beyond mine. I believe in knowing, in wanting, in yearning to define, I believe in relaxing, in searching without reason or rhyme. In poets and painters and artists alike. In wandering; in finding a simplicity in life. I believe in joy and in sorrow...in anger and in fear. In forgetting and forgiving. In what lies in the distance and in what is simply unclear. I believe in you and in me. In our hardship; in our ease. In our yearning and our desire to simply be free.
Molly 09
I believe in moments, i believe in minutes, i believe in time. It passes, it never ceases, it lives on beyond mine. I believe in knowing, in wanting, in yearning to define, I believe in relaxing, in searching without reason or rhyme. In poets and painters and artists alike. In wandering; in finding a simplicity in life. I believe in joy and in sorrow...in anger and in fear. In forgetting and forgiving. In what lies in the distance and in what is simply unclear. I believe in you and in me. In our hardship; in our ease. In our yearning and our desire to simply be free.
Molly 09
Wednesday, May 20, 2009
"Twenty years from now....
... you will be more disappointed by the things you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines, sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.” - Mark Twain
Friday, May 15, 2009
people
People constantly amaze me.
People consistently annoy me.
People rarely shock me.
It is the people who walk gracefully through life that I respect.
I respect the fact that in tough situations certain people carry themselves without ever showing anger or disrespect to anyone.
If only all of us could handle life with such grace.
I know that i definitely do not always know how to accomplish this.
I know that not every situation will please me...i am aware that the only way to handle situations that are making me less than happy would be to remove myself from said situation...however i do not ALWAYS take the graceful way out.
I only wish that i operated in this manner.
And for those whom are graceful, kind, respectful(even when it is less than deserved) i respect you.
People consistently annoy me.
People rarely shock me.
It is the people who walk gracefully through life that I respect.
I respect the fact that in tough situations certain people carry themselves without ever showing anger or disrespect to anyone.
If only all of us could handle life with such grace.
I know that i definitely do not always know how to accomplish this.
I know that not every situation will please me...i am aware that the only way to handle situations that are making me less than happy would be to remove myself from said situation...however i do not ALWAYS take the graceful way out.
I only wish that i operated in this manner.
And for those whom are graceful, kind, respectful(even when it is less than deserved) i respect you.
Monday, May 11, 2009
Thursday, May 07, 2009
Wednesday, May 06, 2009
not so "Important" things
i have an incredible knack for stalling until the very last moment...this in turn causes the chain of events making me about five min late for just about everything i do.
It IS only five minutes but five minutes late is, let's face it, still LATE.
I consciously know that i do this but still have not been able to alleviate the problem.
Now this typically only goes for things that i am not excited to do...for example; work.
To be completely honest most things that i am excited about doing i am usually early.
Meeting someone i like, getting on a plane(cept you have to be early, but i would even if i didnt have to), seeing a movie, catching a train, I think you get the picture.
It gets even worse for things i really don't enjoy doing. I procrastinate things such as getting my car inspected(which i took care of recently, two months late i might add). What i find odd is that i used to be extremely good at taking care of "IMPORTANT" things right away. Don't know why this has changed? Don't get me wrong... I pay my bills, I have not destroyed my credit, or become overly irresponsible. But i have noticed that priorities have changed. I would rather save my money and go on a trip than use it to pay back my credit card and become debt free. I don't know what the point of all this is...it's just something i have noticed about myself in the last few years or so.
It IS only five minutes but five minutes late is, let's face it, still LATE.
I consciously know that i do this but still have not been able to alleviate the problem.
Now this typically only goes for things that i am not excited to do...for example; work.
To be completely honest most things that i am excited about doing i am usually early.
Meeting someone i like, getting on a plane(cept you have to be early, but i would even if i didnt have to), seeing a movie, catching a train, I think you get the picture.
It gets even worse for things i really don't enjoy doing. I procrastinate things such as getting my car inspected(which i took care of recently, two months late i might add). What i find odd is that i used to be extremely good at taking care of "IMPORTANT" things right away. Don't know why this has changed? Don't get me wrong... I pay my bills, I have not destroyed my credit, or become overly irresponsible. But i have noticed that priorities have changed. I would rather save my money and go on a trip than use it to pay back my credit card and become debt free. I don't know what the point of all this is...it's just something i have noticed about myself in the last few years or so.
Tuesday, May 05, 2009
Happy Cinco de Mayo (Another excuse to drink Day)
While you enjoy drinking beer today...i will be serving it. ;-) Hooray.
Saturday, May 02, 2009
Friday, May 01, 2009
shoo fly don't bother me!!!
it's my cake. and the damn fly keeps trying to make me share. Well news flash to all the flies in the world...i don't like to share my cake. I'll share my garbage or my leftovers but HELL if i will share my cake. So back off!!!
Wednesday, April 29, 2009
Tuesday, April 28, 2009
Cake!!! Tonight!!! don't care which song they play...i love them all!!!
Love you madly
Cake (comfort eagle)
Monday, April 27, 2009
Friday, April 24, 2009
Saturday, April 18, 2009
Friday, April 17, 2009
Wednesday, April 15, 2009
my aunt molly's house always smelled like Lysol disinfectant spray... i miss that smell.
traveling, i would always smell the exhaust from the countless buses and bus stations i spent an immense amount of time traveling through... i know it's strange but...i miss that smell.
I absolutely love the smell of the ocean, the sand. I miss that smell.
Bananas are my absolute favorite fruit, i eat them almost everyday... hopefully i will never miss this smell.
to be continued.
traveling, i would always smell the exhaust from the countless buses and bus stations i spent an immense amount of time traveling through... i know it's strange but...i miss that smell.
I absolutely love the smell of the ocean, the sand. I miss that smell.
Bananas are my absolute favorite fruit, i eat them almost everyday... hopefully i will never miss this smell.
to be continued.
Tuesday, April 14, 2009
I have an insane desire lately to write...but whenever i sit down and try to write i come up blank. I am trying to overcome this...writers block but the truth is i havent written anything in quite some time that i feel had any substance. *sigh*
I'll figure it out one of these days just as i always do...right now i am just rambling...hoping that in my rambles something amazing will decide to surface...yeah who am i kidding..amazing...i dont think so.
I'll figure it out one of these days just as i always do...right now i am just rambling...hoping that in my rambles something amazing will decide to surface...yeah who am i kidding..amazing...i dont think so.
Friday, April 10, 2009
Thursday, April 09, 2009
Monday, March 30, 2009
Kitchen Chair
I found this...i wrote it a few years ago and i have to say it is one of my favorites.
There she has sat for many years and doubtless will for more.
Solitary upon her kitchen chair with her eyes directed towards the door.
For a time, she had unquestionable tenderness, that long ago set adrift.
It slipped away not hastily but with each passing tide would shift.
Upon the day it left her she ceased to feel complete.
And now she spends her lonely days perched upon this seat.
Waiting, listless, longing for that feeling of tenderness to return.
But now this task she has set before her remains her one concern.
To wait, to watch, silently in her space.
For another chance, another time or place.
She imagines there it stands, waiting, just out of her sight.
But never leaving her kitchen chair has now become her plight.
To search she feels she musn't. To leave she somehow fears.
What if in her searching it simply returns after all these years.
The longing, completely consuming, the desire always there.
For now she remains waiting, solitary, upon the kitchen chair.
Molly 2007
There she has sat for many years and doubtless will for more.
Solitary upon her kitchen chair with her eyes directed towards the door.
For a time, she had unquestionable tenderness, that long ago set adrift.
It slipped away not hastily but with each passing tide would shift.
Upon the day it left her she ceased to feel complete.
And now she spends her lonely days perched upon this seat.
Waiting, listless, longing for that feeling of tenderness to return.
But now this task she has set before her remains her one concern.
To wait, to watch, silently in her space.
For another chance, another time or place.
She imagines there it stands, waiting, just out of her sight.
But never leaving her kitchen chair has now become her plight.
To search she feels she musn't. To leave she somehow fears.
What if in her searching it simply returns after all these years.
The longing, completely consuming, the desire always there.
For now she remains waiting, solitary, upon the kitchen chair.
Molly 2007
Friday, March 20, 2009
Monday, March 16, 2009
I now have too many hangers...and need to go to buffalo exchange with most of the ridiculously large pile of clothes now on my bedroom floor. But first...i am headed to go check out a new camera para mi. Then to the greenbelt with Liam. Then possibly to Ginger man for pint night. Who knows...it is an absolutely gorgeous day outside.
Friday, March 13, 2009
Friday, March 06, 2009
I am tired. However i have no desire to sleep. Life is just making me tired. I want it to be June 15th. I want to be on a plane. I want to be trekking through a cloud forest. Or wandering through a loud market. Sleeping in an uncomfortable bed, that makes me homesick. Hiking up a volcano to watch the sunrise. Sitting with my feet in the sand on a beach I've never been to; staring out at the waves crashing. Waking up somewhere new. Riding on a loud uncomfortable bus. Talking to someone I've never met in a language i don't know very well. Writing those i miss. Spending all day walking, taking pictures, experiencing life, eating, seeing...living.
panama
Thursday, March 05, 2009
To Do List
Tuesday, February 24, 2009
Tell me do you believe
In the girl that is me
With her feet to your feet
Well that’s all that I need
Cause time will go
And we may be
Far apart I know
But as far as I can see
This is so good
There’s no need for change
It’s alright with me
It’s as simple as it should be
Simple as it should be -----Tristan Prettyman
In the girl that is me
With her feet to your feet
Well that’s all that I need
Cause time will go
And we may be
Far apart I know
But as far as I can see
This is so good
There’s no need for change
It’s alright with me
It’s as simple as it should be
Simple as it should be -----Tristan Prettyman
Friday, February 20, 2009
Saving the Date.
Monday, February 16, 2009
cause i really liked this one.
human life occurs only once, and the reason we cannot determine which of our decisions are good and which are bad is that in a given situation we can make only one decision; we are not granted a second, third, or fourth life in which to compare various decisions. -milan kundera
the god damn plane has crashed into the mountain!
I have recently been rereading all the posts i have made in the past. It seems, to me at least, that when i first started putting my thoughts down here...my writing was more honest...and sometimes even a tad bit humorous (at least to myself, hey if you can make one person laugh). Maybe, i haven't been taking myself seriously for a long time...whatever the reason, i am disconcerted. And have the desire, need, to change things.
Not even just to change things in this blog but to change things i am doing in my life. I am certain that i have not entirely been taking myself seriously in many aspects for quite some time now. I have been planning a trip for about 8 months now and find that i am no closer to leaving than i was when i started. The desire is there, the yearning, the needing, but something inside this silly little head of mine has been slowing me down. This needs to change. No more postponing..."This will not stand, man."
So i am setting a date. Enough is enough. "The god damn plane has crashed into the mountain!"
Not even just to change things in this blog but to change things i am doing in my life. I am certain that i have not entirely been taking myself seriously in many aspects for quite some time now. I have been planning a trip for about 8 months now and find that i am no closer to leaving than i was when i started. The desire is there, the yearning, the needing, but something inside this silly little head of mine has been slowing me down. This needs to change. No more postponing..."This will not stand, man."
So i am setting a date. Enough is enough. "The god damn plane has crashed into the mountain!"
Friday, January 16, 2009
not all who wander are lost
i am wandering through this life just hoping for the things that make me happy...it's not to hard to know what these things are when you find them...suppose it is the search that makes it difficult...so instead of searching i suppose i will keep wandering.
Friday, January 09, 2009
A dust covered window obstructs the view...
and somewhere on the opposite side...a endless sky of blue.
A shattered heart conceals the truth...
a miraculous passion within the depths of you.
A fearful soul disguises the way...
to an endless road of happiness, one can only really know today.
A bitter past shrouds a hopeful future
with the dismal convictions of what cannot be.
Were one to wake each morning with thoughts of only the day ahead.
And lay down to rest with simply the intention of tomorrow.
To forget the mysterious future with thoughts of only here and now.
To never fear tomorrow is to know we can only be alive in this moment.
Silence the shattered heart, for it is your past.
Quiet the fearful soul, for it speaks not for today.
Listen only to the blissful heart for it speaks of what we know to be.
A love we have found within ourselves, a future that is impossible to see.
This very moment in time is all that can matter if a heart is truly allowed to be free.
Molly 2009
and somewhere on the opposite side...a endless sky of blue.
A shattered heart conceals the truth...
a miraculous passion within the depths of you.
A fearful soul disguises the way...
to an endless road of happiness, one can only really know today.
A bitter past shrouds a hopeful future
with the dismal convictions of what cannot be.
Were one to wake each morning with thoughts of only the day ahead.
And lay down to rest with simply the intention of tomorrow.
To forget the mysterious future with thoughts of only here and now.
To never fear tomorrow is to know we can only be alive in this moment.
Silence the shattered heart, for it is your past.
Quiet the fearful soul, for it speaks not for today.
Listen only to the blissful heart for it speaks of what we know to be.
A love we have found within ourselves, a future that is impossible to see.
This very moment in time is all that can matter if a heart is truly allowed to be free.
Molly 2009
Monday, December 22, 2008
figured it out
So for once in my life i think i have really finally figured a few things out. Good things
Tuesday, December 16, 2008
Goals for the Next year...
Read my friends and realized i should have my own.
1. Go to Vegas, Denver, and Costa rica(for a month) in March.
2. Get a job with southwest airlines.
3. Work on going back to school.
4. Always be myself...no matter what.
5. Love as much as I can...
6. Be passionate about life.
1. Go to Vegas, Denver, and Costa rica(for a month) in March.
2. Get a job with southwest airlines.
3. Work on going back to school.
4. Always be myself...no matter what.
5. Love as much as I can...
6. Be passionate about life.
Monday, December 15, 2008
I should just buy this ticket
Holy crap i found a multicity ticket to vegas, denver, costa rica, and back to austin for about $550. i need to just buy this ticket and that will make me bust my ass and save the money that i need to head to costa rica for a month and a week in the other cities. Holy shit!!! I am excited. If the price is the same at the end of the week i am just going to buy it. Hooray me!!!
Monday, December 01, 2008
so costa rica...when shall i see you again.
I have not been able to get into a cedra study or save an obscene amount of money...so costa rica seems to get pushed back over and over again. When will i see it again. It appears it will be sometime this summer...and i will be going even if only for two weeks. I am going to push for april or may. Wish me luck.
Wednesday, November 05, 2008
I have made a decision
When i get into this study that i have signed up for on next tuesday. And i am sure that i am officially a subject and not a backup. I will be purchasing my ticket to costa rica for late January. That way i will have to get my ass on saving for the trip and have no way of postponing it back month after month. This i believe is a good plan.
Monday, November 03, 2008
could you be loved?
So the results are in...and the word precancerous has reared its ugly little head. While i am reassured that it is mearly PRE...i cannot shake the C-word following it up so closely. i have to say that i am more than a little bit freaked out but i also feel that i am coping rather well. Although part of that coping comes from avoiding thinking about it.
Monday, October 20, 2008
Monday, October 13, 2008
I wish, I wish, I wish...
For sooo many things right now. For the money to go to Costa Rica, to not have to deal with any problems that start with the C word, Even wishes as simple as getting to spend this evening with a great guy. Maybe even for the desire to write some more poetry, it has been a long time since i've written anything at all.
Monday, October 06, 2008
Why of why wont they let me fly?
So as i and the rest of the country are already aware...the economy is not so good. With our severe dependence on foreign oil we are slipping in so many industries. I am sure that in a year or so our economy will begin to turn around and face the right direction again...well maybe not "SURE" but definatly optomistic about it doing so. The only way in which it is affecting me in my current situation is that things are more expensive and i havent been able to get a job with SWA let alone an interview. But im holding out, knowing that i a year or so they will lift the hiring freeze and i will be on my way "free to move about the county"
As for everything else in my world...it is great. I have a neato new apt that will be costing me less money. I am taking care of a few health issues. And i am dating someone new :)
As for everything else in my world...it is great. I have a neato new apt that will be costing me less money. I am taking care of a few health issues. And i am dating someone new :)
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